Land of fjords and mighty glaciers

Waterfalls and lonely farms

You exceed our expectations

You have strangely winsome charms.

From the ice age still emerging

Northern lights fluoresce your skies.

Dog sleds cross your frozen valleys

Reindeer drink from holes in ice.

Skiers trek beside your railways

Down the slopes and through the woods

Hut to hut and town to town

Snow-connected neighborhoods.

In the summer’s ceaseless light

Gardens burgeon, crops erupt.

Sheep and goats and cattle graze

Widely on your mountain tops

Sentinel farms on fjords and highlands

Villages with stave church steeples

Glass-towered cities, bullet trains

                                                    Nordic blond athletic people:

Cognizant of all your virtues

We of southern climes salute you.

Norwegians seek a way of life

With moderate ease for all

Secure from poverty and strife,

Painless, enjoyable.

Tail-gating is against the law

As is immoderate speed.

Mishaps are few and far

Between and trips serene.

All buy their homes, cabins and boats.

They ski and camp and sail.

Norway’s the best place to grow old

Live the good life all the way.

You see their statues everywhere

                                                     Those weird Norwegian trolls. 

Big-eyed, big-bellied and big-eared

They’ve popped up from their holes.

Perhaps that’s why on every road

And under every hill

So many tunnels have been bored

With more in progress still.

And even ships will soon descend

Beneath the hills and sea

To sooner reach their journey’s end

From gales and blizzards free.

Safety and comfort are the goals

Norwegians most esteem.

Convenience is why they tunnel roads

And drive with moderate speed.